Many Australian men face mental health challenges, with depression, anxiety, and suicide rates much higher than compared to women, with seven out of nine people, who take their lives each day, male.
However, men are less likely to seek support services, often due to social pressures and traditional notions of masculinity that discourage vulnerability
When mental distress is left untreated, and when societal norms prevent men from expressing vulnerability or seeking support, those internal pressures can explode outward.
In Australia, one in four women has experienced violence by an intimate partner since the age of 15, a figure that dwarfs the rate for men (one in 14).
Emotional abuse is also widespread, 25 per cent of women have been emotionally abused by a partner, compared to 14 per cent of men.
Beyond mental health itself, deeply held beliefs about gender and power play a significant role in enabling abuse.
According to the 2021 National Community Attitudes towards Violence against Women Survey 25 per cent of Australians believe women who stay in abusive relationships are partly to blame and 23 per cent believe domestic violence is simply a normal reaction to day-to-day stress.
These attitudes don’t cause abuse, but they create an environment where abuse is tolerated, excused, or misunderstood.
In 2021–22, more than 6,500 people were hospitalised as a result of family and domestic violence. That’s nearly one-third of all assault-related hospitalisations in the country, and the vast majority of those victims were women.
Social worker, Grace Jennings specialises in working directly with men who use abusive behaviour in their relationships. While her career began in a support role for victims of violence, she grew frustrated with systems that placed the burden of safety on survivors.
That frustration became the driving force behind her PhD research and current frontline work, aiming instead to intervene with the people causing harm.
Ms Jennings said mental health is just one of many contributing factors that can lead men to use violence or control in relationships.
“There is research that shows the links between poor mental health, particularly depression, and increased risk of using abusive behaviours,” Ms Jennings said.
“There are also links to increased social isolation with men who report having higher levels of social support are less likely to use abusive behaviour than men with lower levels of support.”
She supports programs which encourage men to relate from the inside out, with self-worth, ethics, and emotional regulation.
“Men who use controlling or coercive behaviour relate from the outside in. They see their partners and children as reflections of their self-worth and stability, so it becomes destabilising for them when others in the family exercise independence,” she said.
Ms Jennings emphasises that addressing men’s violence requires looking not just at individual behaviour, but at the broader social and cultural norms that shape it, particularly expectations around gender, power, and emotional control.
She believes real intervention also depends on helping men build the emotional skills needed to relate to others in safe and ethical ways.
However, she is cautious about generalising men who use violence, noting that her clients come from a broad range of ages, professions, and cultural backgrounds.
“But what most of them have in common is that they are fathers,” she said.
“A main motivation for them to address their abusive behaviour is their children and increasing their capacity for safe fathering.”
She said effective programs need both individual support and group learning, to help men shift harmful patterns and build better relationship skills.
But she’s clear that mental health isn’t a justification for abuse.
“Men don’t use violence because they have poor mental health,” she said.
“Men who use violence do so because of a range of personal and social factors, mental health is just one of those factors.”
Mental health advocate, Howard Blackburn delivers workshops across schools, workplaces, and sporting clubs with the charity LIVIN.
“I wanted to use what I’ve learned to support others and help break down the stigma around men’s mental health,” Mr Blackburn said.
He believes one of the biggest challenges men face is the lack of consistent, safe spaces to talk openly.
“There’s often no environment where these conversations happen naturally or regularly,” Mr Blackburn said.
Without support, these struggles can manifest in harmful ways, through withdrawal, substance abuse, or aggression, which often damages relationships.
“Open, honest conversations in these close networks can make a huge difference,” he said.
For Mr Blackburn building a culture of checking in, without judgement, is essential.
“At the end of the day, we can’t truly support others unless we’re also looking after ourselves,” Mr Blackburn said.
